And With That, the 2022 Season Comes to An End

Two Years Later…

You know in books, or movies when they fast forward in time and have a little line that says “Six months later,” or “1 year older?” That’s almost how it feels now, as though we’ve fast forwarded past the accident. Sure, there are lasting effects, there always will be, but we’ve moved into a season, and with that, new adventures. Time moves on, no matter how much we want it to slow down.

Two years. As I type this, it’s just a few hours away from being 2 years since the accident. As you read this, it already has been two years. I’m starting this post the day before to give myself time to write it. Most of the time, I’m ok. Life has slowly returned to “normal” or at least as close to normal as it will get for us, whatever normal is anyways. And then I have moments when it hits me about what’s happened, what we’ve been through, and I need a little time to regroup and pull myself back together and move forward. But I think that’s all just a part of the process.

Last year, I wrote about the Adventure. You can find that post here, along with a link where I talk about the accident and what happened:

——————————————–What Would Life Be Without Adventure?———————————————

What Would Life Be Without Adventure?

It’s hard to believe it’s been a year since that horrific day. It’s a day we will remember for the rest of our lives. We set out on an everyday common adventure. A trip to the store, a trip for Christmas items. It was something we’d done many times before and since. But that day…

December 19, 2021December 20, 2021

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Sometimes I look at photos of the accident, or photos I took of myself in the hospital, and it feels almost surreal. There were moments when I wondered how I would ever survive, how I pulled through despite everything that happened. But there is a plan and purpose that we don’t always understand.

And now, here we are. Two years later. This year, we wrapped up one season of our lives and moved on to the next. Like any good story though, what happened in previous seasons will always stay with us and sometimes, it may even come back around. This year, I continued recovering from a major accident, returned to teaching and landed a new position that I love ,which allows me to work from home, and we got a new puppy. I completed NaNoWriMo again this year, and wrote quite a bit, all things considered, in a book series I’m working on. On the downside, Ben’s health continued to get worse , he had cataract surgery, and my dad ended up in the hospital for over a week due to an infection. It’s been another roller coaster year. Sometimes it feels like every year is.

We are in a story far greater than anything we could have ever written ourselves. Like every great story, there are ups and downs, there is danger and adventure. Two years ago today our lives changed, in a few seconds time. Nothing will ever really be the same again, but how can it be? We are not the same. Like any well-written story, our lives are no different. We grow. We change. Through the trials , when we keep on keeping on, we become better and stronger, more of who we were meant to be. The 2022 season of our lives wasn’t an easy one, but I’m sure life never really gets easier. We get stronger. We learn how to cope, how to deal better with what’s thrown at us. I know for me at least, my faith has grown stronger as well. I’m not who I was 2 years ago. I will never be that person again. And that’s ok. Somehow I think that’s how it’s meant to be.

Two years ago, we started off on an adventure that should have been happy and fun. It quickly became dangerous, painful and tough. Yet through all of it, we clung to our faith in God and to the promise that there will be a better tomorrow, even if it’s not this side of Heaven. Along this journey, we’ve found we are never alone, and that sometimes what happens to us isn’t about just us. I’ve had people tell me they don’t understand me. They don’t understand how I can still rejoice and be so joyful when so much has happened, so much has been lost. It’s not all sunshine and rainbows, and I do have tough days, sometimes really tough days, but I try to keep my eyes focused on what lies beyond this life, not just the here and now. That’s what matters most in the end.

As 2022 comes to close, I look back on the past 2 years and try to give myself a moment to realize how far I’ve come, and how much we’ve been through. But I don’t stay there. For there is much to look forward to in the future, and work that still needs to be done. Sometime in the next couple of weeks, I’ll do a post on goals for the coming year, and what we’re focusing on next. I’ll leave you with some photos from 2020, quotes and scripture that have come to mean a lot to me, and photos from this past year. And with that, the 2022 Season comes to an end….

Nov 29

It’s Enough to Keep Going

Physical Therapy, Occupational Therapy and Surgery

About three weeks ago, I had surgery to fix some of the internal damage caused during the accident. As I mentioned before, I had two hernias that needed to be fixed, one large and one small, involving a couple of my organs. The surgery itself went pretty well, but during surgery, they discovered that what they thought was a small hernia was much larger than expected, and more of my organs than initially thought were involved. The surgery took longer than planned, and recovery is also taking longer. It ended up being a pretty major surgery, but thankfully the doctors were still able to do it robotically with just a couple of extra small cuts.

I have a weight restriction until at least the first week in December, and have to limit exercise to walking. I haven’t been able to do many chores over the past three weeks either. Most of Physical therapy has been put on hold until I recover from this surgery enough to start back up. I will begin increasing how much weight I lift in the next couple of weeks, and see how it goes. Recovery has been much slower than we expected, but each day I am able to do a little bit more.

Writing

One of the few perks of not being able to do much after surgery is having more time to write. I have a wireless keyboard and mouse, so I’m able to sit back with an ice pack on my stomach and write while I rest. I mentioned writing briefly a couple of posts ago, and again in my Thanksgiving post, but wanted to talk more about it.

I’ve been a writer since I could put pencil to paper. I’ve written articles for others blogs and newspapers, run my own blogs such as this one and www.myamuseinglife.com, and had a little something published in someone else’s book, but I have yet to publish my own books. Over the past eight years, I’ve really started taking my writing seriously and tried to write more each year. For the most part, even with getting two Master’s degree, I’ve been successful at writing more and more. Until this year at least. Not being able to write has been really tough. I found ways to keep trying to write, like speech to text, but it hasn’t been easy, and I’ve found myself feeling anxious a lot. It’s made me realize just how true the following quote is:

Writing has become as natural as breathing. November is National Novel Writing Month, or NaNoWriMo as we call it in the writing world. If you aren’t familiar with it, it is where you write 50,000 words or more in a month. Some people are what we call “NaNoWriMo Rebels,” and they may set smaller goals as well. I did this back in July, knowing I wasn’t likely to hit the 50,000 with everything going on. My goal in July was 15,000 and I was able to meet that.

I usually do NaNoWriMo and Camp NaNoWriMo (which run in April and July) every year, every chance I get. Sometimes I fail, sometimes I succeed. But I try to remind myself that every word I write is more than what I would have had otherwise. NaNoWriMo has changed my writing life, and I often write 50,000 words under normal circumstances during non-NaNoWriMo months as well. Before the accident, it wasn’t uncommon for me to have 5000-6000 word days, especially after I finished my second Master’s degree and had more time to write. Sometimes I would even have 8000-10,000 word days.

Since the accident, I’ve been able to write very little. Most of the writing in this blog after the accident was done at first using a microphone and speech to text software. As I started being able to type, I began writing more with the keyboard, but it’s been a long road back.

This month, November of 2021, I met my NaNoWriMo goal of 50,000 words. I averaged about 2000 words a day, took a few days off for surgery recovery, and had a few 4000-5000 word days as well. I even managed to finish a few days early, and started writing more in another series I’m working on. All together, I’ve written over 60,000 words this month. This is huge. It’s still only half of what I could write on an average day, which means if I had the time and physical ability, I could probably write almost twice that in some months, but I managed to meet my goal. It was a pretty big deal, and another step on my road to recovery. It’s also helped to keep my mind busy while recovering from surgery, since it is taking much longer than expected. So this week, I celebrate not only meeting that goal but going over it.

Ben’s Health

We’ve mentioned Ben’s health a few times. Most people know that he has idiopathic peripheral neuropathy. We still don’t have any real answers on his health, and the neuropathy has started spreading to his hands. We try to just take it one day at a time. He has several medications that he takes. One of them makes him sleepy a lot, but it has helped him get more rest and improved his overall mood and pain level when he is awake. Hopefully one day we will have more answers than questions, but for now, we keep searching and asking those questions.

Songs on Repeat

Help Is On The Way- TobyMac

Lauren Daigle- Rescue

Lecrae- I’ll Find You

This one really isn’t a song, but worth the share…Jordan Peterson; A Wing and A Prayer

Scripture and Quotes

It’s Enough to Keep Going

This year really hasn’t been an easy one. If we’re honest, we’ve had a lot of really difficult years. A lot of loss, pain, death, sorrow.

Ben and I will celebrate ten years of marriage on Friday, and even in all the loss, even with all the pain and grief we’ve faced, there is still light and hope. Our relationship is strong, and good. God has given us each other to lean on even in the really tough times. And there certainly have been a lot of them, but that seems to be so much of life. Just when we think things might get easier, better, something else happens. Life is full of surprises. To quote Michonne from ‘The Walking Dead’ TV show:

“But it hasn’t gotten any easier. Sun keeps rising. Days keep passing. World keeps spinning. Time- it just keeps moving forward. Weeks, months, even years go by., while you try to make sense of it all. Try to find where you belong, try to look ahead to a better future. But the truth is, the path ahead has only grown darker. It’s harder to see. You can feel so lost, so alone, so desperate for something, anything that might show you the way.
But even now, after all this time, surrounded by darkness, there are still flashes of light, tiny beacons that shine out, calling to us. It’s not enough to light the way ahead, but it’s enough to keep going. Keep trying, keep fighting, Keep dreaming. So that’s what I do. Every second of every day. For you, for us. I haven’t given up, and I never will.”

Life is full of so many twists and turns. Sometimes it feels very dark, and yet the light is always there. Our Christian faith carries us through these dark times. Our trust that God is there, lighting the way, even if all we can see is a small flicker of the way ahead, is enough. Years fly by, and sometimes we can’t understand everything we are facing, but we don’t have to.

The little flickers of hope are always there. The love we receive from others, sometimes strangers we barely know, the messages from those who don’t even know us but want to reach out, the love from family and friend are all beacons of light. Our story becomes part of others stories too. All of it speaks of something greater than all of us, of a purpose for everything that happens.

I’ve always loved the Christmas season and enjoy watching Christmas lights blink on and off. It’s amazing how much those little tiny lights can light up a dark room. In the Christian faith, Christmas is important because it is the day we celebrate the birth of Christ. Now I know that He wasn’t really born at this time, but it is when we celebrate. Every year, when I see the lights, I am reminded of the Light that came to the world.

Sometimes when life throws us so many curves, it can be really hard to see light through the dark. But light shines through the darkness, always. Sometimes only in small flickers, but it is always there.

Look to the Light. He’s enough to keep us going, even in the midst of dark times.

-Cindy